A fresh start
I want to set the tone for this series. Because a relationship series can be discouraging. All of the shoulda, coulda, wouldas come to mind. Especially if you’ve been working on your relationship for awhile. But I want you to remember that we serve a God whose mercies begin afresh each morning.
In this message I’ll cover the four stages of conflict:
- Withdrawal: There’s almost always a talker and a pouter
- Escalation: This is where your emotions start to get involved and rule.
- Belittling: The “You gun” comes out and you start to fight to win. You say things that you can’t take back.
- False beliefs: You go to bed full of shame and lies start to take over your thoughts.
But don’t worry…we’re not just going to leave you hanging. There are also three biblical principles for managing conflict:
- We’ve got 24 hours: Sometimes dealing with conflict immediately is not wise
- Don’t use absolutes: “You always,” “You never…” These are rarely–if ever–true.
- Holster the “you gun”: Stop blaming and pointing fingers.
At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves. When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. 9 Then the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” 10 He replied, “I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked.”Genesis 3:7-10 NLT